Livin' Off the Fat of the Land

An Essay On Library Bureaucrats, the Taj Mahal, and the Hanging Gardens of Babylon


James Duvall, M. A.
Big Bone University

At my house we often sing a little song I wrote, called “Livin' Off the Fat of the Land”. I play piano while my six oldest sing at the top of their lungs. The chorus goes:

It feels mighty grand,
Livin' off the fat of the land.

I suggest to you that this would be a good Teaparty theme song, because a lot of our tax-spending bureaucrats are doing exactly that — livin' off the fat of the land, without much regard to whether the rest of us eat or not.

This week I went with a group of Teaparty members to protest a tax-increase. I am interested in anything to do with Libraries, and this was at the Kenton County Public Library, where I, like some of the others, am a card-carrying member. Like so many people I am normally at work at 9.30 in the morning. Fortunately, I am out of work, and so was able to accept Garth's invitation to attend.

I did not intend to speak, but when my turn came I felt compelled to speak up for all the parents who couldn't be there because they work, but still do not have the funds for additional taxes right now. You have to have your head above water in order to live off the fat of the land.

Library Board Meetings are normally very exclusive affairs. Like so many government activities, they can be quite boring, and normally are, unless you you happen to have a personal interest (as we did this day), or are one of that class of person who happen to like that sort of thing. (Shouldn't their heads be examined?)


Names and Faces for the Board

The Board consists of the following individuals, a number of whom are closely associated with Northern Kentucky University. Lois Schultz, President, Jim Adams, Vice-President, Jim Horner, Treasurer, Tony Milburn, Secretary, and Susan Mospens. Additional addendees were Charlotte MacIntosh, Regional Librarian for the Kentucky Department of Library and Archives, a financial adviser, Dave Schroeder, the Director of the Library, and an assistant.

We were invited in almost as soon as we arrived by the President, Mrs. Schultz. She began a list of those who wished to speak. This is not strictly necessary, and State Law provides that those who wish to speak at Public Meetings are not required to identify themselves. The first speaker was asked to begin almost immediately. The Board was there to get this part over as soon as possible. People were making good statements, and very much to the point. I felt the situation was very difficult; I had met a few of the people we were speaking to before, but a lot of them I didn't know. I was the forth of fifth person on the list, so I rose when my turn came and said: “I always like to have names and faces on my bureaucrats; could each of you tell us who you are, and your position.”

Mrs. Schultz, a handsome lady I had met briefly years ago, apologized and requested each person at the table to introduce themselves. I believe that Ms. MacIntosh went first. I remember her once telling me about her adventures in old barns and attics in West Tennessee tracking down copies of Confederate newspapers that hadn't been seen since they were printed — much more interesting than Board Meetings! Then there was, according to my sketchy notes, Mr. Milburn, looking at us over the top of his glasses, as if we were a hostile jury. There's a reason for that; he's a lawyer, with one of those big Cincinnati firms. Next, I think, was Mr. Horner, a man with silver hair, and a rosy round face that looked very nice whenever he finally got around to smiling. He insisted at one point, “We are conservative in our expenditures.” But that was not proved on this day.

Then there was the gracious Lois, presiding at the center of the group. And then, beside her, was Susan Mospens, who appeared to be irritated once or twice, but managed mostly to appear unfazed by our intrusion; get it over with, and get on to business. Then there was Mr. Adams, associated, I believe, like Mrs. Schultz, with NKU. He looked a little like Uncle Al, or perhaps your sixth grade teacher. Perhaps that's what he was dozens of years ago; in fact he probably sounded a bit like a not-very-well-informed teacher when he made the motion to “lower the tax rate(!)” to 11.6%. The accompanying remarks made about as much sense; such remarks as “this is the best balanced solution”, and “we can't have it all my way; we can't have it all your way!” (He got his way—this time; we need eliminate his independence of the voters!)

At the table furthest from me sat Dave Schroeder, the Director, between his able assistant and a financial adviser. Mr. S. has worked for the Library for twenty years. He is a very nice person—he was a little nervous this day, I think, but he handled himself well. He is a very informed person, and it is a virtual certainty that he knows more about Covington and Kenton County history and genealogy than anyone else in the world. I did not catch the name of his assistant or the financial adviser. Evidently the adviser had told them it was a very good financial deal for the Library to raise taxes; at least for them. This, then, was the major cast of characters. Would anything we had to say be able to change their minds? At least we had gained something. By knowing who they were the situation became more personal, and I will say that all the comments made from people both for and against the proposed raise in taxes, were received attentively by the Board.

Most of the speeches were not lengthy. Mine might have lasted three minutes, perhaps less. Time moves strangely when you stand up to speak. I recall pointing out that even if the project were a good one this is not the right time to raise taxes. Someone brought out a copy of the budget (Kenton is almost the only Library in the State that publishes its budget online. That is a good thing!), and someone else had a chart showing how much the taxes for the Library had gone up in the last decade. Dr. MacElheny delivered a rousting speech, following one almost as good by her husband. As a CPA he mentioned that he often audited small businesses, many of which are right on the edge — this might be enough to cause them to fail. (After all $11 million sucks a lot out of a local economy.) Dr. Mac got applause when she spoke, especially when she came to the part about the astronomical rise in health care (that's her baby!). A lovely lady, a Council-woman for Independence, spoke movingly about living on a fixed income, which had been halved, and about 30% of which went to pay for her healthcare insurance. Such common situations in these days are important to take into consideration when it comes to taxation for any purpose.

Not every person there was opposed to the tax; some spoke for it. With maybe one exception (am I just imagining this?), the people for the tax were bitter, and some of them spoke almost angrily. One ugly talking person, who I would say looked like a little old man, but that would be insulting to little old men, took occasion to disparage my seven children and myself in the course of her little diatribe. Why does such an one need to insult others to make her point? I would suppose we are all glad she doesn't have seven children—they might all be like her. I wonder why she didn't get as much applause as some of those opposed to the tax?

We had there also two candidates for Kenton County Judge Executive. Mr. Arlinghaus commented that the Library takes in approximately as much as the rest of the county government combined. Mrs. McDowell pointed out that our children—for whom the project is supposedly being done—are going to inherit a huge debt. (How are they going to enjoy it in a few years when they are going to spend all of their time paying for it?) It might be better to let them decide how they want to spend their money, and perhaps the best thing we can give the next generation is a good example, by not spending beyond our means!

At one point one of the Board Members, I think Ms. Mospens, said, “We're taxpayers, too!” That is true also, but as I pointed out to someone after the meeting, they are spending their own money, as well as other people's.

Probably the most stunning observation I have to make concerns the false “compensating tax rate” that is so blatant an offense in the faces of the taxpayers of Kentucky. Mr. Schroeder read this tortuously worded piece of legalize to us, and then stated that it meant the Board could not receive less taxes than it had the year before! In other words, this piece of legislation, originally proposed to protect us from an increase of more than 4%, and which has done so much damage in robbing us, is now being used to say that legally the Board must raise taxes!

I don't know what you think of this, but it was too much for me. Perhaps it was very rude of me, and if so I apologize humbly to Mr. S., to the Board, and to the Public at Large, both taxpaying, and non-taxpaying; but I interjected the remark: “You don't have to raise the tax rate at all!” I thought that this devilishly worded document meant that if the tax-rate was to be raised it could not produce less than approximately what it had the year before. Now bureaucrats are reading it to prove that they have to raise the tax rate each year, by law. This means only one thing. We as taxpayers must press our Legislature to change this infamous law. That way I will never have an excuse to be rude at a Board Meeting again, at least not about taxes.

Let me say that I understand why Mr. S. wants a better facility. It is not even that I think the project is a bad thing in itself. The money could be spent for worse projects. The question here was is this the time to do it?

The Board thought so. Mr. Best-Balanced-Solution even stated: “We need to take advantage of these economic conditions.” I take it he meant interest rates, not the working (or lack) of the people expected to pay for it. The fact is that the outcome of the vote was predetermined, not by secret conspiracy—that is beyond anything I could possibly consider—but by how much the Board had already invested in the project, psychologically and otherwise. They had to get through the Public Hearing, but nothing said could affect the outcome:

It feels mighty grand,
Livin' off the fat of the land.

Mr. Horner also issued a challenge for those of us from Boone County. (This was a practice session for us. We are sharpening our Library cards as I write.) He said: “This is not Boone County—and this Board is not responsible for what happened in Boone County!” Whether this referred to the Taj Mahal, or the temporary tax reduction to 5%, is unclear; but we are equal to the challenge.


Changing the Situation

Board Members of any entity that can tax must be directly responsible to the taxpayers. Mr. Horner's statement about the “best balanced solution” was followed by the remark that this was a “compromise” that balanced “all constituencies”. The people who pay should have the say! Children, the homeless, computer users, book borrowers, program attenders, etc are not “constituencies”, they are recipients, whether it is you, me, or anyone else. A constituency is by definition a “body of voters”, not people who want or use something. (Though bureaucrats are famous for changing the meaning of words!) The only real constituency of a Board should be the taxpayers. In theory the Board represents them, but the voters must also make it so in practice. Obviously this is not now the case; but it would be if these people had to stand for election. As it is in every case, of which I am aware, the Board scratches the Director's back, and he or she makes sure not to rub them the wrong way. (See my essay on this subject: "Then There Are Five" )

No one can make it to the meetings of all the Boards that can raise taxes. I think they should all take place in a single location (say the Fiscal Court Meeting Room), on the same day each year. Perhaps on Election Day, when everyone is feeling Civic Minded, each Board could be given an hour or two to make their case for a raise in revenue, if it is really necessary. All employers could be encouraged to let people have the day off to go to the meetings; we might even start to get a little more citizen participation in government, as in the old time Court Days, that were attended by all.

We need some PIGs (Public Information Gatherers) to attend these meetings and take notes, or even record them; after all, they are public. We need all the information we can get. Even this essay is written from a few notes and what I remember; with all the good will in the world my impressions are not as valuable as solid truth, such as would be possible if it were packed chock full of accurate and informative statements. (Incidently I have been told my writings might appeal to old people, so if you enjoyed this at all you know where you stand!)

So, was our visit to the Board wasted? Certainly not. Could the Board rescind its decision? Certainly. Epictetus, the great Greco-Roman philosopher, who started life as a slave, once remarked that the only prescription for refusing to change your mind when you are wrong is Hellabore; they administered it in those days to lunatics. So far as living to fight another day, my grandfather used to say if you get knocked down in a fight, start on their toes! Never give up! Learn from whatever happens, and be better prepared next time. Better yet, work to make the rules fair—let's work to make Boards accountable through the election process, revoke the murderous “compensating tax rate”, which is false, and create a better America. Once the bureaucrats on the Boards are responsible to the taxpayers I care not whether they decide to build the Taj Mahal, the Tomb of King Tut, or the Hanging Gardens of Babylon, so long as a great majority of the taxpayers agree. (Well, I will still care, but at least I will not feel so bad about it.) Then, maybe, the last line of my song will come true for all:

It's almost more than I can stand;
Livin' off the fat of the land.

Written 18 Aug 2010.

Big Bone University: A Think Tank, Research Institute, & Public Policy Center
Established 2000 A. D.
Nec ossa solum, sed etiam sanguinem.
Big Bone, Kentucky

jkduvall@gmail.com

To Those Who Attended the Meeting:

I regret I cannot recall the speeches of everyone present who spoke. If you care to write out what you said, or think you said (which might be even better), I would be happy to include it here. Thank you for your contribution to the discussion; you represent many others who were unable to attend.

Note that Boone County is getting ready to build a new facility in accordance with the “Five Mile Plan”. It will cost more than the one Kenton County proposes to build. Let's take Mr. Horner's advice, and make the Boone County Board of Trustees responsible for that. Perhaps we should start before they get too much invested in the project.


AQQ: Archival Quality Quotation:

“. . . and the people shall labour in vain, and the folk in the fire, and they shall be weary.” Jeremiah 51.58.

Typed 21 Aug 2010.